...well when you are doing just about anything! Especially as you get older. I seem to be always planning ahead, almost wishing the time away. There's always something that we are looking forward to, isn't there? The weekend, the next pay packet, the next holiday. And this just makes time go even faster. I want to put the brakes on...just slow down a minute will you; I need to catch up, catch my breath. Five minutes ago I was just finishing my A levels, buying my first house, having a baby...and now that baby is almost 12 years old. Whoa there, slow down! I looked at my youngest daughter the other day and wondered how much longer she would be a little girl, it seems that in the blink of an eye I'll be packing her off to university, and then what will I do?
So, the only way I can see to overcome this is to stop planning. Stop looking forward to that next holiday or pay packet and start enjoying today. This calls for a bit of 'getting my act together' I believe. What is it that I want to be doing with this time that I don't have enough of? Having goals isn't planning. I am not saying when I want to achieve things by, just that I want to achieve them. And so to the lists. I'm good with lists. I like them, in fact, I live for them.
So here's the first living in the infintessimal present list:
I must not:
1. keep glancing at the calendar and working out how many days until pay day
2. Fantasise about attending my daughters' Phd graduation ceremonies (or indeed, my own)
3. Fantasise about the death and subsequent funerals of people I hate
4. Keep working out how many weeks there are until our holiday to Singapore
5. Have suicidal thoughts about having to return to the UK in 18 months time
6. (And just because I shouldn't, even though this has nothing to do with the passing of time) walk up to fat people in the shopping mall food court with a homemade warrant card and say 'Weight watchers police, portion control,put the fork down and step away from the plate sir'
1. Stop moaning about being bored and actually do one or all of the following:
- research for my Phd
- revise my spanish using all the computer packages/books I have bought
- learn arabic
- practice my piano
2. Actually go to work to fill my day with activity because when I am 'working from home' I am bored off my cake
3. Live by the Japenese proverb that 'time spent laughing is time spent with the Gods'